3 Days

This Sunday is almost over and it is the last Sunday ever to be pregnant at church.  Hallelujah!  I appreciate all the smiles and words of encouragement, but to be honest, I won't miss those questions of "are you ready?!"  "are you excited?!"  There is a very sarcastic side of me really wants to give very sarcastic answers.  I know I have been guilty of this question many times over to very pregnant women.  I should really think of something creative to ask them, like, "So,  what's going to be your first meal after you have your baby?"

I am really trying to seal this feeling, of baby inside.  She really moves her little knees and bum around. In fact, the other day, I swear I was able to grab her foot.  I'm trying to enjoy these last few days because I know one day I will miss it.

At this point in the pregnancy I am just trying to keep my brain occupied with things other than pain and medication.  My meds are way down and it's pretty much torture.  My relationship to them is uncomfortable to think about, I literally fear pain, like I would have a fear for anything.  These next 3 days are going to be rough, to say the least.

I am starting to really anticipate the induction.  It's all coming back to me.  How uncomfortable the IV is, how hard and fast the contractions can come with petocin, and the fear I have for getting my epidural.  Of course there is all the unknown too.  Who knows what could potentially take place at the end of the day.

But here's the thing;  I totally trust that Jesus has ordained this entire pregnancy and He has ordained my future with labor and delivery and the future of Esther.  I can rest my mind because I know these things to be true.  It's all laid out, everything that will and will not happen is already written and I just need to go with it.  I need to be thanking Jesus for bringing me through and continuing His story through me.

I've got 2 full days at home to prepare, one of which has plans for a pedicure and lunch with my Home Community ladies.  Tuesday will be full of laundry and cleaning and packing up the boys.  Oh, and at some point we have to fit in carving pumpkins and double checking halloween costumes.  Wednesday, we will leave for Vancouver sometime around lunch time and then I can be occupied by family and getting ready for Trick or Treating.  Oh gosh, I can just feel myself getting anxious thinking about those last few hours before we check into the hospital.

I keep hoping she will just come naturally, like tonight.  Though, I'm not too hopeful as there seems to be no signs and all my babies have come late.

Thankful:
Costco and it's early stocking of peppermint pretzels.  Watching AFV with my boys and having our traditional snack night.  My kitty that cuddled with me all afternoon.  That I am just a few days away from being done with morning sickness and heartburn.  Fleece sheets.  Baptisms.  The Gospel.  My church family.  People that are willing.  1000 piece puzzles.  Our home.  A vehicle that works and holds our family, even as squished as the kids will be in that back seat once she is here.   A Doctor has been gracious and understanding and wants to be apart of her arrival.


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